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Questions & Answers - Behavior Concerns
I need to know how to handle my two year old when she is biting at
day care. The owner of the center is threatening to remove her if this
problem continues.
Biting is a very common behavior in toddlers and really, among
developmentalists is considered a "typical" though challenging behavior
or stage that some (not all) children go through. We do often hear of
children being pulled from day cares, sometimes due to the pressure of
the parents of the children who were bitten. But, a good developmental
day care, should know how to deal with the behavior (as challenging as
it can be in a group setting) and help remedy it, along with the parent
of the child who is doing the biting. These are links to two articles
(biting and why bite) that is already appear our web page related to
biting and how to handle it.
I would suggest reading the above articles and
then planning a time to sit down with your child's
day care teachers and discuss yours and their
concerns so that you can both get on the same page
regarding this behavior. You and your day care staff
need to figure out when and why the biting is
occurring: Is she tired, is she frustrated, is she
angry another child took a toy away, is she upset
someone is too close to her? Is this behavior only
occurring at day care? Is it happening only in the
presence of a certain caregiver? Are there certain
children being bitten or is it random?
There is a reason behind a bite that most children cannot
verbally communicate. Many day care centers do not have adequate
staff to always "shadow" a biting child, however, if for a few weeks
they are able to have a worker "shadow" your child and intervene
BEFORE a bite occurs, this can be helpful. You need to all be
dealing with biting in the same way and the second article tells you
ways to do this. One thing you never ever do is bite the child back
to teach them a lesson.
If your child is age appropriate in receptive and expressive
language, you may want to give her something to carry with her when she
feels that need/urge to bite, like a soft rubber toy or chew tube ( the
chew tube is a
therapy tool used by speech/OT) and tell her things like "It is ok to be
mad, but you may NOT bite people" or "You may bite on this, you may not
bite your friends/Susie/Mommy). Some children actually have an
oral need or fixation to bite or chew things, but this is a special
circumstance and my not at all apply to your child.
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Questions & Answers - Behavior Concerns
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