Therapist
Questions & Answers - Special Needs & Medical Diagnoses
I have a 9 year old son who has pdd. I also have
a 1 year old daughter who is his 1/2 sister and he is great with
her. He plays with her, and attends to her, makes her laugh. On 2
separate occasions he got aggressive with her. The first time he
pushed her head and said it was because she kept dropping her bottle
after he kept giving it to her, and the second time he kicked her
and said it was an accident. My question is, how can I differentiate
if he is telling what happened or how or should I hold him
accountable for his actions?
Let me preface this reply by telling you that I am not an expert
in PDD, and my expertise in working with children on the autistic
spectrum is centered on the 0-3 population. I have read on various
parenting forums for families of older children with PDD or autistic
spectrum disorders that male children sometimes become more
aggressive around the age of 9 as they near puberty and are
producing more testosterone.
Some families have addressed concerns with aggression and
outbursts with the child's teachers and have asked for more
behavioral therapy to work on specific issues, or visited a
psychologist to assess whether any other disorders are contributing
to their child's aggression (ADD/ADHD, Conduct Disorder,
Oppositional Defiant Disorder). Some families have chosen to try
medication to control aggression and have found success. I would
definitely address these concerns first and foremost with your son's
teaching team at school and see if perhaps goals can be built into
his IEP to address these issues, then if that is not successful you
may want to move onto one of the other above mentioned steps. You
asked about his accountability, and I do not believe a child's
diagnosis or disability excuses him from his actions, so his
aggression with his younger sibling should be addressed in a manor
that is suitable to his intellectual level.
This is the only way he will begin to learn that his actions were
not appropriate in that situation. If he is hurting his sister it
cannot be ignored and must be dealt with in the moment when it
happens, but you would deal with it based on his cognitive level,
whether it be a time out, loss of privilege or a demonstration of
how he could have acted differently and more appropriately. It
sounds like your son may need to be in close supervision with an
adult when he is around your younger child, and should not be left
alone with her. Many parents do acknowledge that their children
with PDD can be extremely loving, caring and sweet, but that often
little things may set them off...and your son can probably not yet
understand that the behaviors of a one year old (dropping her
bottle is a game to her, but to him it was just plain annoying or
distracting) are not intentional and intended to annoy him and so
he may deal with her as if another 9 year old were to continuously
throw or drop a toy.
Children with PDD also often have language and social
interaction difficulties, so instead of your son being able to say
"Knock it off sis" or "Mom, she is bothering me", or being able to
understand the social cues of a baby, he acted out toward his sister
to stop her actions from bothering him. You may be able to do some
role modeling and positive reinforcement with your son at home to
work on specific situations which may occur with his little
sister...for example, when she is dropping her bottle from the high
chair, you keep picking it up and making it a fun game,
demonstrating to your son a positive way to interact to this
situation and rewarding him for his appropriate play with your
daughter. Lastly, you might want to look into sensory issues with
your son, if this isn't being addressed, for example an
oversensitivity to sounds (the sound of the bottle hitting the
floor), could be enough to cause an outburst. An occupational
therapist at your son's school should be able to explain sensory
therapy. I have also found a link that
describes
aggression associated with PDD.
Therapist
Questions & Answers - Special Needs & Medical Diagnoses
Return to Top